Wow, I just looked at my stat counter and was super suprised to see that my daily blog stalkers have doubled. It's cool and exciting huh?! Listen to the drama queen whine about how hard the show prep she signed up for is. Dudes, you could comment (Well I know a few of you do,) and show a girl some love ya know.
In other news, this is rather random crap post because I have lots of random thoughts today.
I went to the gym this morning at 630 for my morning cardio. I was driving by the practice field for the local high school and was impressed as well as suprised at seeing the local team out in uniform practicing. Good for them. If I had one wish for any high school athlete it would be that they would learn now, the importance of being conditioned for their sport. If I had been conditioned in high school the way I have trained myself now I feel like I could have gone a lot further and been a lot more beneficial to my team. Not to mention I would have upped my confidence that was seriously lacking at the time.
Then I was thinking, I have been training for 60 days. Like contest prep for 60 days. That is almost 60 hours of morning cardio and who knows how much afternoon cardio. Wow, that is a lot. TOO much if you ask me, but yep... you are right, nobody's askin me. I pay Big Jon the money and he barks out orders. I follow all training orders to the T. and I follow all nutrition guidelines to the T as well, except for when my other personality comes out (The few times it has) and over takes my body and makes me do something I didn't plan on. Luckily, those have been few and far between.
I am officialy 1 month out from contest #1. I filled out my application today. Texted Big Jon, said holy crap, I'm scared. Only one month!
Big Jon: "Don't be a wuss."
lol, everyone needs a Jon in their life. I have one for free (a husband) and I pay one. I sometimes think it is weird to think "I pay Big Jon to hate him o much of the time we are together." He does push me just a bit further than I like, but that is what gets results so that's why he is worth the money.
I pick up my suit MONDAY!!! Wooohooo!! I can't believe my sewer lady is that fast. I am so excited. I can't waite to start posing in it. It is gonna be carazy!! I am going to go play at a few make up counters Monday too in hopes they can help me get "Stage" ready. I am a mom, and wife, who is a bit on the simple side I would say so "Stage" make up will be A LOT different than what I do usually. I am excited for it though.
I talked to Jon yesterday about my type A personality and how I really need to know what my fate is for after my show so I can fully prepare and be ready for what happens. I got some glorious news which is atleast 5000 times better than what I was expecting.
After show, I will be starving. Let's just say it like it is. I will literally be starving and dehydrated.... but BaAaBy I am gonna loooook goooooood being starving and dehydrated. Anyway, back to the plan. I will get to go EAT, whatever I want. Like even cookies he said. I emailed my local Gramma and said "I need some service girl, I need cookies wrapped in a package that can not be opened til after my show on the 29th so I can EAT those friggin cookies right after." Ya, she said yes. Duh, she knows I am starving. Thanks Gma!!! Then I get Sunday to eat whatever. (prolly no dairy or alcohol cuz He always says that-- even though he knows I am LDS and I don't drink. So the only thing Ill be missin is ice cream, but I can do with out if can get me some a Gramma's famous chocolate chippie COOKIES!) Monday I can eat, but more reserved and Tuesday it is game face on girl finish out the rest of that hill until the 19th and get my perky butt back on stage.
YEAH! Girl, I gotta pretty perky booty these days. It aint perfect but it is GETTIN there baby.
In other news, the scale is still at 128.3. Rude. Good thing he didn't really make me waite til 127 for my cheat or I woulda never gotten it. I think that's what he was thinkin.
In other news, that's all I got for today. 1 month to go. I got 1 month to give it all I got and finish this race. I ask for your help. In whatever you are doing, give the next 30 days all you have in honor of me. This isn't going to be easy, but people keep telling me it's going to be worth it. SO GAME ON. Let's do this.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
MindLESS Eaters
Guess what?!
Today I am calling you out, due to some recent knowledge I acquired through my own acnoledgement today. I think you should make a plan for tomorow of exactly what you are going to eat, and make a schedule of it. So, like me, eat every 2.5 hours and have it scheduled so there is no room for error in your "food day." Write it down.
I promise you that if you do this you will realize two things.
1. You eat all day long.
2. You let food cue your hunger, and not hunger cue your hunger.
oh ya and 3. You aren't hungry every time you eat.
So today, if I were not on a scheduled meal plan and time schedule this is what I would have added to my consumption and it is only 2pm.
breakfast:bites of kids honey bunches of oats. left over banana (1/2) baby didn't eat.
cake pop when I opened fridge to put milk away
rice cake when I put cereal away
cookie when I stopped at Maverick to get soda (oh ya, defintily had another one or two a those even though I still haven't hit 127)
(but next week Big Jon said it is gone so ya, I am drinking it this week yo!)
Atleast 2 oreos from 4 year olds little baggie, atleast 5 nutter butters out of 2 year olds.
taco with hubby at lunch, extra cheese when I did the dishes
bite of cheese tortilla and atleast 2 strawberry's of 4 year olds. Atleast 2 spoonfulls of whipped cream.
cake pop when 4 year old had one.
(please do not mind my kids have had a lot of crap today. We are recovering from bithday still.)
Dude. Do you understand that I am NOT hungry? My current meal plan leaves me more than satisfied. I do not feel a hunger pain. These are just random thoughts I have as I go through out my day that I KNOW I WOULD have eaten had a not been on a plan.
I really do wonder how many extra calories that would equal. I don't want to figure it out, too lazy. But more than I should have for a day FOR SURE.
A facebook girl I follow, the fighter diet says that one shouldn't be trusted to trust their hunger cues. Rather, they should trust their schedule. I thought that was a little extreme....
Until today when I really thought about how many times I THOUGHT about eating something that wasn't on my plan.
That's a lot.
How many times a day do you think or eat something that you aren't hungry for, or doesn't even taste good. I have talked with people who have said that they have actually eaten and 5 seconds later when asked what they had didn't remember.
Not good. Not good at all. I am learning. Teach yourself too. Try this out tomorow and tell me how it goes.
Today I am calling you out, due to some recent knowledge I acquired through my own acnoledgement today. I think you should make a plan for tomorow of exactly what you are going to eat, and make a schedule of it. So, like me, eat every 2.5 hours and have it scheduled so there is no room for error in your "food day." Write it down.
I promise you that if you do this you will realize two things.
1. You eat all day long.
2. You let food cue your hunger, and not hunger cue your hunger.
oh ya and 3. You aren't hungry every time you eat.
So today, if I were not on a scheduled meal plan and time schedule this is what I would have added to my consumption and it is only 2pm.
breakfast:bites of kids honey bunches of oats. left over banana (1/2) baby didn't eat.
cake pop when I opened fridge to put milk away
rice cake when I put cereal away
cookie when I stopped at Maverick to get soda (oh ya, defintily had another one or two a those even though I still haven't hit 127)
(but next week Big Jon said it is gone so ya, I am drinking it this week yo!)
Atleast 2 oreos from 4 year olds little baggie, atleast 5 nutter butters out of 2 year olds.
taco with hubby at lunch, extra cheese when I did the dishes
bite of cheese tortilla and atleast 2 strawberry's of 4 year olds. Atleast 2 spoonfulls of whipped cream.
cake pop when 4 year old had one.
(please do not mind my kids have had a lot of crap today. We are recovering from bithday still.)
Dude. Do you understand that I am NOT hungry? My current meal plan leaves me more than satisfied. I do not feel a hunger pain. These are just random thoughts I have as I go through out my day that I KNOW I WOULD have eaten had a not been on a plan.
I really do wonder how many extra calories that would equal. I don't want to figure it out, too lazy. But more than I should have for a day FOR SURE.
A facebook girl I follow, the fighter diet says that one shouldn't be trusted to trust their hunger cues. Rather, they should trust their schedule. I thought that was a little extreme....
Until today when I really thought about how many times I THOUGHT about eating something that wasn't on my plan.
That's a lot.
How many times a day do you think or eat something that you aren't hungry for, or doesn't even taste good. I have talked with people who have said that they have actually eaten and 5 seconds later when asked what they had didn't remember.
Not good. Not good at all. I am learning. Teach yourself too. Try this out tomorow and tell me how it goes.
Monday, September 26, 2011
Made it Through
the birthday celebrations. At my house, we don't party once... we party ALL day long.
I want my babies and my man to know just how special they are, and today was no different.
I made it through sprinkle pancakes, sprinkle strawberries, pink sugar cookies, tacos for dinner and cake pops.
You can bet your a$$ it was hard. And you can also bet your A$$ I will be having me some cake pops come oh... November 20th ish. So it really is no big deal, couldn't have em today.... but in two months, they will be MINE. And Ill prolly eat atleast 4.
There you have it. Birthday celebration #1 to make it through was a HUGE success for this figure competitor in training. HOLLA GURL!!!
I want my babies and my man to know just how special they are, and today was no different.
I made it through sprinkle pancakes, sprinkle strawberries, pink sugar cookies, tacos for dinner and cake pops.
You can bet your a$$ it was hard. And you can also bet your A$$ I will be having me some cake pops come oh... November 20th ish. So it really is no big deal, couldn't have em today.... but in two months, they will be MINE. And Ill prolly eat atleast 4.
There you have it. Birthday celebration #1 to make it through was a HUGE success for this figure competitor in training. HOLLA GURL!!!
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Birthday Parties
Someone please just kill me now.
My 4 year old's birthday is manana. I knew it would be hard, and suprisingly it isn't THAT hard. But, it IS hard.
Picture it please, steak, shrimp, salad, potato0 cubes.
followed by
Your choice of chocolate, cookies and cream, or vanilla ice cream. Then please add any topping you want or can imagine. My husband, my dad, my step mom, and my two babies are livin' it up over there in the kitchen while I sit here in the living room typing this-- thinking about blue sparkly bikinis and flat abs.
Someone, please PLEASE kill me now.
My 4 year old's birthday is manana. I knew it would be hard, and suprisingly it isn't THAT hard. But, it IS hard.
Picture it please, steak, shrimp, salad, potato0 cubes.
followed by
Your choice of chocolate, cookies and cream, or vanilla ice cream. Then please add any topping you want or can imagine. My husband, my dad, my step mom, and my two babies are livin' it up over there in the kitchen while I sit here in the living room typing this-- thinking about blue sparkly bikinis and flat abs.
Someone, please PLEASE kill me now.
Saturday, September 24, 2011
A Few Picutres
All done up... this is me one day out of... seven probably. I need darker face makeup seriously bad.
well hello bulging bicep... so good to see you... PRE WORKOUT baby.
And good to see you too, pimples EVERYWHERE!!!
Really, baby?! No face shot?! I need a photographer up in here stat.Kinda funny, I asked my hubby to take some pics of me before our date night/cheat meal Friday and I said specifically "I want my whole body in it so I can see what I look like in clothes right now."
SOOO, he took like 4 pictures of my body and no face. Oh brother, babe seriously?! Like I wouldn't want my face in the pic!!!
Anyway, the pictures of me in my hat and no make up... (yes my face is broken out like a crazy lady, don't know why. Super annoying though) are what I look like usually. We were headed to the gym before our date night. I wanted the pics in clothes and makeup because they are so few and far between these days I wanted to remember what I looked like cleaned up.
Honestly. I just feel super ugly without my hair and makeup done. But considering that I am training for between 2 and 3 hours every day, being a mom, house cleaner, chauffer, chef and wife-- make up and hair straightening time just doesn't happen most days.
I am looking foward to stage prep week, getting nails done, toes done, tanning, waxing, makeup. It will be fun to be all girlified and glitterfied to present my hard work.
Oh by the way just some food for thought. My cheat meal this week was without carbs. LAMESAUCE! Well, if I had to guess it was my last cheat meal ever until after my show, and I am definitly without carbs in anything else I get. But anyway, funny how every single cheat meal with out fail I have felt soo sick afterwards except this one. Steak, shrimp, mushrooms, salad, and cashews for dessert. Not one ounce of yucky bloating or wanting to throw up everywhere. Interesting. I think those carbies are no good for my body, even though my brain totally CRAVES them and MISSES them.
A good lesson to have this weekend. I also made posters and posted them EVERYWHERE in my house. I will display pics soon. Pretty cute, thanks for the suggestion Lisa, they have really finished off my decorations in my house perfectly!
Happy Saturday!
Friday, September 23, 2011
My heart is Full
Here are a couple of comments from my last post. THANK YOU! Is all I can say to you both! You really have no idea how much the push and the kind words have meant to me.
It is so easy to quit. I just know the after math of quitting would probably kill me, or atleast give me an ulcer and probably force me to find some prozac.
I am going to be taping up some cute little posters in my kitchen today. To remind me who I am, where I came from, and what I am gonna look like on Nov. 19th.
Thank you for rooting for me, there are far too many people in this world that find excitment and joy in tearing others down. They are few and far between that take the time out of their busy, busy lives to build others up and I am forever grateful for those who I have found, and have found me.... I have more than my fair share of cheerleaders and when the going gets tough-- THAT is what I need to remember.
Feeling blessed today.
Brooke9b said...
I think it's really normal what you're goind through! Try and have inspirational/motivational pictures/quotes/people/etc around you for the time of day/location that triggers you to feel sad/depressed/HUNGRY etc :) Just a thought, right after my dinner I brush the heck outta my teeth, floss & mouth wash so that I think more than once before I eat or drink anything besides water before bed.
September 22, 2011 7:45 PM
Lisa said...
Teri,I know we have never met, but I feel totally connected to you and your journey. I think about you every time I have a "cheat". I realize that I am not in training so I have come to a middle ground with it, but its simply because I do not have the will yet. There is a reason you are here. A reason you are being sculpted. I am not talking about the external (though its lookin' mighty fine!). You are being forged into something greater. It is not a pain-free process and it is not for the weak-hearted. GOOD ON YOU for taking on the challenge and working the hell outta it!! IF IT WERE EASY, EVERYONE WOULD DO IT. IF IT WERE EASY, EVERYONE WOULD DO IT. Get a white-board marker and write that on your mirror, your fridge, your pantry... anywhere you need it because its the truth. You wanted more, you wanted better so you have to work for it. And the more and better you will get out of this process will be life-changing for you. DO NOT GIVE UP!!! I am rootin' for you as I climb my ass up that damn stairmaster and everytime I wonder how the hell you do it for 60 minutes. You drive me to work harder. You can't quit because I'm not ready for you too.Now, go. Eat your bland-ass food, drink your fishtank-o-water, and kill your muscles. It will be sooooo worth it when you own that stage!!!
It is so easy to quit. I just know the after math of quitting would probably kill me, or atleast give me an ulcer and probably force me to find some prozac.
I am going to be taping up some cute little posters in my kitchen today. To remind me who I am, where I came from, and what I am gonna look like on Nov. 19th.
Thank you for rooting for me, there are far too many people in this world that find excitment and joy in tearing others down. They are few and far between that take the time out of their busy, busy lives to build others up and I am forever grateful for those who I have found, and have found me.... I have more than my fair share of cheerleaders and when the going gets tough-- THAT is what I need to remember.
Feeling blessed today.
Brooke9b said...
I think it's really normal what you're goind through! Try and have inspirational/motivational pictures/quotes/people/etc around you for the time of day/location that triggers you to feel sad/depressed/HUNGRY etc :) Just a thought, right after my dinner I brush the heck outta my teeth, floss & mouth wash so that I think more than once before I eat or drink anything besides water before bed.
September 22, 2011 7:45 PM
Lisa said...
Teri,I know we have never met, but I feel totally connected to you and your journey. I think about you every time I have a "cheat". I realize that I am not in training so I have come to a middle ground with it, but its simply because I do not have the will yet. There is a reason you are here. A reason you are being sculpted. I am not talking about the external (though its lookin' mighty fine!). You are being forged into something greater. It is not a pain-free process and it is not for the weak-hearted. GOOD ON YOU for taking on the challenge and working the hell outta it!! IF IT WERE EASY, EVERYONE WOULD DO IT. IF IT WERE EASY, EVERYONE WOULD DO IT. Get a white-board marker and write that on your mirror, your fridge, your pantry... anywhere you need it because its the truth. You wanted more, you wanted better so you have to work for it. And the more and better you will get out of this process will be life-changing for you. DO NOT GIVE UP!!! I am rootin' for you as I climb my ass up that damn stairmaster and everytime I wonder how the hell you do it for 60 minutes. You drive me to work harder. You can't quit because I'm not ready for you too.Now, go. Eat your bland-ass food, drink your fishtank-o-water, and kill your muscles. It will be sooooo worth it when you own that stage!!!
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Bi Polar
FYI I am not making fun of people who are bi polar. But under my understanding of it, I really feel like sometimes I have it!!
One day I am go hung about this process and I am living in the moment, loving it. Eyes on the prize of being on a stage in a small royal blue sparkly bikini... and then outta no where I come home from a hardcore workout and I feel like I am going to kill someone if I don't eat some carbohydrates.
I have wanted to quit this whole thing like 30 times in the past 60 days. A good half of my time has been spent wishing I would have secretly signed up for this so I could secretly quit and not feel like an idiot.
Why do I always open my mouth?!
For the accountability. Welp, I got that. People know. I'd feel like an idiot if I quit. But last night I really REEALLY reallly wanted to.
I even tried to. I told my hubby I was done. And I had my phone ready to text Jon and break up with him too.
I mean, I am living for a cheat meal. Really, like I am living for it. The only thing getting me through the days is the fact that I know I have a cheat meal coming sometime soon.
Dude. That isn't even healthy is it?
I took 2 doses of caffiene yesterday. One pre 60 minutes of stairs (ya, girl. Rocked that workout). One pre 90 minute lifting legs and 30 more stairs. (yep, almost rocked that one too). But then I got home and I was jittery and crazy and I wanted to kill someone AND eat a lot of food.
I always think to myself. Why? Why do I want to eat this or that? What is it that I am looking for that I am not getting. NOTHING tastes that good. I just want to be able to eat whatever the crap I want. I hate hate hate that if I even eat a blueberry I am cheating on my nutrition. I do not like cheating. I do not like feeling like a cheater.
My hubby tried with all his might to keep me on the wagon, he really wants me to finish. He really thinks I'll regret if I quit.
I really think he is right. I really think that's what I wanted him to say, but at the same time I was hoping he would just say "enough, be done."
He didn't.
I mean, when I think about quitting half way through the process I feel like right NOW it would feel SOOO good, but in two months I feel like I would feel really sad. And I feel like in 10 years I will look back on these moments and be thankful for the opportunity and the process... more so than in ten years looking back and regretting the process and the occasion.
I was at the 24 hour club at 2 am this morning doing my stairs because I could not sleep. Note to self: I will not take caffiene after my morning session anymore ever. I know that is ridiculously weird that I was at the gym at 2 am. I know my body needs rest to recover and grow. Couldn't do it. I felt like the biggest freak in the entire world driving 2o minutes to get to the stair climber. I was wide awake though.
I thought, pondered, worried, stewed the whole time. How am I going to finish this? I don't want to. But I don't want to quit. I want to wear a sparkly bikini and I want to be proud of what I accomplished. I just HATE the process that gets me there.
Is that weird to finish? Really. What would you do? I am just curious because I see other people's blogs and it really does seem so easy for them, and I just can't figure out for the life of me, WHY this is sooooo hard for me. It really is, it is so hard.
I thought it was going to be easy. I read about girls binging, I thought they were weak. I read about girls chewing gum all day, thought they were weird... and now I chew gum all day. I hear about skinny girls saying they are fat, looking for attention. Dude, I don't think they are. I really think they think they are fat. I am not fat, but I still feel like I have sooo far to go-- how can I ever be ready in 5 weeks for show 1? That is like, basically 5 workouts per body part left.
I think I am going to a posing session with my trainer this weekend which is when I believe he is going to evaluate if I will be stage ready in 5 weeks.
Wow. I sorta can't believe it. I sorta need some advice. I really need to get rid of any cheat meals I may deserve at 127 because it is so close.
I am crazy. Every.other.stinkin.day. I do not know why. But this is one, nope, pretty sure this is THE hardest thing I have ever done. Sorry to whine, again.
One day I am go hung about this process and I am living in the moment, loving it. Eyes on the prize of being on a stage in a small royal blue sparkly bikini... and then outta no where I come home from a hardcore workout and I feel like I am going to kill someone if I don't eat some carbohydrates.
I have wanted to quit this whole thing like 30 times in the past 60 days. A good half of my time has been spent wishing I would have secretly signed up for this so I could secretly quit and not feel like an idiot.
Why do I always open my mouth?!
For the accountability. Welp, I got that. People know. I'd feel like an idiot if I quit. But last night I really REEALLY reallly wanted to.
I even tried to. I told my hubby I was done. And I had my phone ready to text Jon and break up with him too.
I mean, I am living for a cheat meal. Really, like I am living for it. The only thing getting me through the days is the fact that I know I have a cheat meal coming sometime soon.
Dude. That isn't even healthy is it?
I took 2 doses of caffiene yesterday. One pre 60 minutes of stairs (ya, girl. Rocked that workout). One pre 90 minute lifting legs and 30 more stairs. (yep, almost rocked that one too). But then I got home and I was jittery and crazy and I wanted to kill someone AND eat a lot of food.
I always think to myself. Why? Why do I want to eat this or that? What is it that I am looking for that I am not getting. NOTHING tastes that good. I just want to be able to eat whatever the crap I want. I hate hate hate that if I even eat a blueberry I am cheating on my nutrition. I do not like cheating. I do not like feeling like a cheater.
My hubby tried with all his might to keep me on the wagon, he really wants me to finish. He really thinks I'll regret if I quit.
I really think he is right. I really think that's what I wanted him to say, but at the same time I was hoping he would just say "enough, be done."
He didn't.
I mean, when I think about quitting half way through the process I feel like right NOW it would feel SOOO good, but in two months I feel like I would feel really sad. And I feel like in 10 years I will look back on these moments and be thankful for the opportunity and the process... more so than in ten years looking back and regretting the process and the occasion.
I was at the 24 hour club at 2 am this morning doing my stairs because I could not sleep. Note to self: I will not take caffiene after my morning session anymore ever. I know that is ridiculously weird that I was at the gym at 2 am. I know my body needs rest to recover and grow. Couldn't do it. I felt like the biggest freak in the entire world driving 2o minutes to get to the stair climber. I was wide awake though.
I thought, pondered, worried, stewed the whole time. How am I going to finish this? I don't want to. But I don't want to quit. I want to wear a sparkly bikini and I want to be proud of what I accomplished. I just HATE the process that gets me there.
Is that weird to finish? Really. What would you do? I am just curious because I see other people's blogs and it really does seem so easy for them, and I just can't figure out for the life of me, WHY this is sooooo hard for me. It really is, it is so hard.
I thought it was going to be easy. I read about girls binging, I thought they were weak. I read about girls chewing gum all day, thought they were weird... and now I chew gum all day. I hear about skinny girls saying they are fat, looking for attention. Dude, I don't think they are. I really think they think they are fat. I am not fat, but I still feel like I have sooo far to go-- how can I ever be ready in 5 weeks for show 1? That is like, basically 5 workouts per body part left.
I think I am going to a posing session with my trainer this weekend which is when I believe he is going to evaluate if I will be stage ready in 5 weeks.
Wow. I sorta can't believe it. I sorta need some advice. I really need to get rid of any cheat meals I may deserve at 127 because it is so close.
I am crazy. Every.other.stinkin.day. I do not know why. But this is one, nope, pretty sure this is THE hardest thing I have ever done. Sorry to whine, again.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
128.3
Shut the Front Door.
He is gonna think I have been cheating... which I have not!!!
So what is goin on, that scale is goin down baby down!!!
Maybe it was the pants during my HIIT yesterday?!
I don't know, but I LIKE IT!!
Gotta little love from my ol pappy last night.... meant a lot to me.
I sent him my text that said "Thanks for the nudge earlier today, I needed it."
He said "My pleasure, you have no idea how proud of you I am and will always will be. Now lets bust some ass and get this done well so we can eat some tacos again."
Ahhhh.... my heart. Thanks daddy! This has been hard on everyone, me not being able to be around food, not being able to go get food. We admit it, we socialize around food a lot. But it's what we do, and after this-- while in much more moderation than what used to be, it will go back to the way it was again.
I don't think I am in danger of eating 1 whole bag of m & m's myself anymore. But I will be able to feel ok indulging in a few here and there. Not too many though because I really, really do like the way I look and I don't want to lose sight of the work that I have put into getting here and how much I appreciate my body and the way it looks now.
Now thanks for the love on my last post!! Your good vibes must be working so keep sending em my way so I can get that cheat meal!!! Woop Woop!!
He is gonna think I have been cheating... which I have not!!!
So what is goin on, that scale is goin down baby down!!!
Maybe it was the pants during my HIIT yesterday?!
I don't know, but I LIKE IT!!
Gotta little love from my ol pappy last night.... meant a lot to me.
I sent him my text that said "Thanks for the nudge earlier today, I needed it."
He said "My pleasure, you have no idea how proud of you I am and will always will be. Now lets bust some ass and get this done well so we can eat some tacos again."
Ahhhh.... my heart. Thanks daddy! This has been hard on everyone, me not being able to be around food, not being able to go get food. We admit it, we socialize around food a lot. But it's what we do, and after this-- while in much more moderation than what used to be, it will go back to the way it was again.
I don't think I am in danger of eating 1 whole bag of m & m's myself anymore. But I will be able to feel ok indulging in a few here and there. Not too many though because I really, really do like the way I look and I don't want to lose sight of the work that I have put into getting here and how much I appreciate my body and the way it looks now.
Now thanks for the love on my last post!! Your good vibes must be working so keep sending em my way so I can get that cheat meal!!! Woop Woop!!
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
129.7
Totally broke through the 130's today.
I am feelin it.
I wore pants to the gym. Hate working out in pants but wanted to sweat more.
Big Jon says I get my next cheat meal when I hit 127. I have been at 130 for oh..... like a month.
OH CRAP!!! What if I don't get to 127. That's gonna really really suck. But I have decided to go without diet dr pepper until I hit 127 and then I shall have tacos, rice, beans, chips, salsa, diet dr pepper, bananas and peanut butter.
There it is. That's what's on this menu for this girl. I haven't had a cheat meal since last Saturday and I was really expecting one THIS Saturday. So, I like to have a goal to work towards. HIIT is gonna get harder, and I am gonna chug more water and I am gonna hit 127 and hopefully it is SOONER than LATER.
Wish me luck. xoxo
I am feelin it.
I wore pants to the gym. Hate working out in pants but wanted to sweat more.
Big Jon says I get my next cheat meal when I hit 127. I have been at 130 for oh..... like a month.
OH CRAP!!! What if I don't get to 127. That's gonna really really suck. But I have decided to go without diet dr pepper until I hit 127 and then I shall have tacos, rice, beans, chips, salsa, diet dr pepper, bananas and peanut butter.
There it is. That's what's on this menu for this girl. I haven't had a cheat meal since last Saturday and I was really expecting one THIS Saturday. So, I like to have a goal to work towards. HIIT is gonna get harder, and I am gonna chug more water and I am gonna hit 127 and hopefully it is SOONER than LATER.
Wish me luck. xoxo
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Mirror
Wow buddy I just went to take a bath and shave my legs. I had been growing the hair for 4 days, thinking I was going to wax it in two weeks and keep it up til after the show.
Well trainer and trainer wife think shaving is a better idea and since I pay them to have the ideas I follow them.
As I was getting into the bath of course I checked myself out, who doesn't? Don't lie. I know you do it.
Tonight was different though.
Dude, I saw the outline of a flat stomach on my round stomach. It still has its bulginess but it is getting flatter and I can see the abdominals trying their hardest to COME OUT!! Yay muscles. Keep comin, you can do it. I love you, you are working so hard!! Let's do this. Let's show the world ab muscles on my stretch mark tummy ok!!!
Oh ya, and I saw really nice lean arms. Shoulder cap isn't quite as prominent as I want, but it is coming and for the first time in my life I can say the biceps I have been working on FOREVER are finally there.
Wow, what a nice dessert. Being happy with my reflection tonight.
Well trainer and trainer wife think shaving is a better idea and since I pay them to have the ideas I follow them.
As I was getting into the bath of course I checked myself out, who doesn't? Don't lie. I know you do it.
Tonight was different though.
Dude, I saw the outline of a flat stomach on my round stomach. It still has its bulginess but it is getting flatter and I can see the abdominals trying their hardest to COME OUT!! Yay muscles. Keep comin, you can do it. I love you, you are working so hard!! Let's do this. Let's show the world ab muscles on my stretch mark tummy ok!!!
Oh ya, and I saw really nice lean arms. Shoulder cap isn't quite as prominent as I want, but it is coming and for the first time in my life I can say the biceps I have been working on FOREVER are finally there.
Wow, what a nice dessert. Being happy with my reflection tonight.
Sunday Rest Day
One question. What do people do with all their time?!
It is Sunday and I decided to skip church because I would be going alone, while my hubs is on shift, with both kids for two straight hours. Have you met my 2 year old? Can you say "kill me now?"
So we went and visited some family thank goodness to get me out of this house I was going nuts. (mmm, nuts... almonds, walnuts, peanuts...) All I have thought about all day is food. Planning out my meals for after show #1, after show #2, then after after. Thanksgiving plans. Checked in with all my friends to see how their cheat meals went (I don't get them anymore fyi, unless I LOOK like I need one to Big Jon... sure wish I saw him everyday at 6 am when I do cardio... He'd be more inclined to give me one I bet).(Another side note, never wearing make up or taking a shower before I meet with him... might help my chances more. I don't care what time training is... 5 pm, Ill take my makeup off right before). :o)
Why is it that I WANT to rock that stage like nobody's business in the hottest, smallest, sparkliest, bluest two piece ever-- but equally want to quit and eat whatever the heck I want whenever the heck I want it. That is what is standing between me and looking nothing less than amazing. This overwhelming love of all things food.
What the heck? It's just food. I know what it ALL tastes like, (trust me in my old life I tried anything, everything, always and rarely would waste a thing). I only have two months left from tomorrow and this is all going to feel like a zillion years behind me.
WHY?! Why is food such an obsession.
I hung out with my cousin for a bit today and she really helped me think about it less. She told me how easy it is to follow her meal plan, and while she is eating a bit different than me it is still strict and the same thing every day. So even that will eventually get boring to me but ANYTHING seems so much better than 1/4 c oats and 1/2 c brown rice for my carbs. I JUST MISS SOME FRIGGIN THICK BREAD OR SOMETHING!!!
I can do this. I am doing this. I own stripper heels, I have a swim suit being cut and made specially for MY body. I am growing muscles, I am staying away from those temptatious foods and I am a figure competitor in training. Food is just that. It's food. I need to stop thinking about it in any other light than the fuel that feeds my process to get to MY destination.
Getto fabulous fitness Momma.
Ya that's me.
Anyway. It would be less hard to stop thinking about food if I was working out for 3 hours as usual, or if I was dropping my 4 year old off at preschool and picking her up. But it's Sunday. My husband is working and I didn't go to church. Which leads me to have WAY too much time on my hands.
So, now I am wondering... what am I going to do when I have all this time back? Will I keep training like this? Will I keep working out twice a day. I kinda like it like that. I definitly wont be doing 1 hr 25 minutes of cardio EVER EVER again. But 2o minutes in the morning, fasted? Maybe. Lift later little cardio right after. Ya, maybe.
I wish I could learn to love the fuel for the process as much as I love the training for the process. That's my goal this week. To enjoy it. To enjoy the process, the whole process. More than likely, I'll never do this again and I will never ever get a whole 2 more months of time focusing MOSTLY on just me. I really should enjoy it. Cuz before long it'll be all about the hubs and kiddos again and I will be the lost one in the background like usual.
Which is ok, because I chose this and I wouldn't choose it any other way if I had to do it again. I love this life. Love this family, and I couldn't be more thankful they put up with me, this getto fabulous fitness mama.
So, all you readers... yes I know about 30 of you who check everyday. What do you do with your time? Are you competitiors? Are you fitness enthusiast? Are you crafters? Are you moms? What do YOU do?
It is Sunday and I decided to skip church because I would be going alone, while my hubs is on shift, with both kids for two straight hours. Have you met my 2 year old? Can you say "kill me now?"
So we went and visited some family thank goodness to get me out of this house I was going nuts. (mmm, nuts... almonds, walnuts, peanuts...) All I have thought about all day is food. Planning out my meals for after show #1, after show #2, then after after. Thanksgiving plans. Checked in with all my friends to see how their cheat meals went (I don't get them anymore fyi, unless I LOOK like I need one to Big Jon... sure wish I saw him everyday at 6 am when I do cardio... He'd be more inclined to give me one I bet).(Another side note, never wearing make up or taking a shower before I meet with him... might help my chances more. I don't care what time training is... 5 pm, Ill take my makeup off right before). :o)
Why is it that I WANT to rock that stage like nobody's business in the hottest, smallest, sparkliest, bluest two piece ever-- but equally want to quit and eat whatever the heck I want whenever the heck I want it. That is what is standing between me and looking nothing less than amazing. This overwhelming love of all things food.
What the heck? It's just food. I know what it ALL tastes like, (trust me in my old life I tried anything, everything, always and rarely would waste a thing). I only have two months left from tomorrow and this is all going to feel like a zillion years behind me.
WHY?! Why is food such an obsession.
I hung out with my cousin for a bit today and she really helped me think about it less. She told me how easy it is to follow her meal plan, and while she is eating a bit different than me it is still strict and the same thing every day. So even that will eventually get boring to me but ANYTHING seems so much better than 1/4 c oats and 1/2 c brown rice for my carbs. I JUST MISS SOME FRIGGIN THICK BREAD OR SOMETHING!!!
I can do this. I am doing this. I own stripper heels, I have a swim suit being cut and made specially for MY body. I am growing muscles, I am staying away from those temptatious foods and I am a figure competitor in training. Food is just that. It's food. I need to stop thinking about it in any other light than the fuel that feeds my process to get to MY destination.
Getto fabulous fitness Momma.
Ya that's me.
Anyway. It would be less hard to stop thinking about food if I was working out for 3 hours as usual, or if I was dropping my 4 year old off at preschool and picking her up. But it's Sunday. My husband is working and I didn't go to church. Which leads me to have WAY too much time on my hands.
So, now I am wondering... what am I going to do when I have all this time back? Will I keep training like this? Will I keep working out twice a day. I kinda like it like that. I definitly wont be doing 1 hr 25 minutes of cardio EVER EVER again. But 2o minutes in the morning, fasted? Maybe. Lift later little cardio right after. Ya, maybe.
I wish I could learn to love the fuel for the process as much as I love the training for the process. That's my goal this week. To enjoy it. To enjoy the process, the whole process. More than likely, I'll never do this again and I will never ever get a whole 2 more months of time focusing MOSTLY on just me. I really should enjoy it. Cuz before long it'll be all about the hubs and kiddos again and I will be the lost one in the background like usual.
Which is ok, because I chose this and I wouldn't choose it any other way if I had to do it again. I love this life. Love this family, and I couldn't be more thankful they put up with me, this getto fabulous fitness mama.
So, all you readers... yes I know about 30 of you who check everyday. What do you do with your time? Are you competitiors? Are you fitness enthusiast? Are you crafters? Are you moms? What do YOU do?
Friday, September 16, 2011
Balooo!!!
Early morning treadmill walking for me started my day off just right.
Then I met up with my trainers wife, aka my friend/mentor Shawna to go meet an amazing seamstress named Nicole to get my figure suit figured out.
So wish I would have had this appointment last week because it has me all excited and re ESTATIC for my show.
I looked through fabrics but really all ready had in mind what I wanted.... bright PiNk, PuRpLe, or GrEeN. And then I got there and fell in love with this bright, sparkly BlUe. Oh, I am in love. It is shimmery and oh- s-o -perfect.
I tried on another suit to get the feel for what my bottoms will be like and the top. Well the top is rockin. I really liked the green color I am wearing but after having both up to my skin we (all three of us there) felt like blue made me POP more. And honnnnney, with all this sweatin and hunger stuff I want to strut and pop on that stage like nobody's bizness.
So we got the suit figured out and the master minded sewer lady is going to make mine a bit higher in front and a bit wider at the chotch area to lessen the significance put on my fupa. New term I learned flabby upper pubic area. Sorry, I know bad visual. But you needed to know what this FUPA word meant, I mean. People have been throwing it around like crazy lately and I was going nuts not knowing what the heck they were referring to.
Well, now I know. Don't google pics. You'll regret it I am sure. But it is a saggy lower lower tummy area that has been on me since I was born and was made much worse after my horrid pregnancy's. The good news is FUPA is getting smaller as my body fat decreases, the suit will be higher so I will be able to tuck a lil FUPA in, and my tan will cover a lot as well.
All in all, I felt good about the way I was looking 6 weeks out in my tiny two piece.
I mean. I almost liked what I saw in one of her three mirrors I looked in.
Anywho, I have my little fabric sample out and ready to remind me of what all this hard work and dedication is for. To look good in that suit, knowing that I put my heart and soul into this process to take my body to its perfect (or as close to as I am capable) condition.
And there is only 2 months left! Yikes. I mean. There is only 1 month 13 days til show number 1, and there is 1 month and what 29 days til show 2 is over. Holy moly. That is so nerve recking when I say it out loud. But I am ready. I am ready to rock this freight train outta the park.
I can't waite for my next progress pictures because honestly, it seems like I am leaning out more and more every day. And I rocked my workouts today like you wouldn't believe.
My cardio after lifting got upped to 25 minutes today (could it be because I got caught in the peanut butter jar Wed....??? maybe). Rude. But I actually really love my after lifting session because I have the juice to go BIG and go HARD on that stair climber for that short amount of time. I sorta love it when people look at me on there like I am crazy. I am crazy yo!!! I am so crazy it's unreal some days.
I hit some really great poses at the gym tonight too. Back nice and flat with my lats out. I am really most concerned with getting my back pose right, because if it isn't right... it is really just messed up looking and I wont get good judging because of it. So I am practicing, practicing, practicing. Side posing is the easier of the poses and I feel like those are coming along well, especially as my shoulder caps pop out more and more each week.
Happy Friday! I went to a football party sorrounded by all this yuuuummmy football food, but knowing what I am accomplishing at each fueled meal, left me more than satisfied with my protein shake instead. I don't know how this new Teri got here, but I like her and I hope she sticks around for the next 8 weeks. Cuz we got this, and I am gonna rock this show!!
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Atleast Something Is Going Right
I made Jared take off his shirt last night and humor with me pictures. He has a meal plan he is supposed to be following, but isn't. So, in order to help me with MY meal plan... he is going to be following his for the next six weeks so we can see how much muscle he can put on. (Note, no he doesn't take steriods... and although he is really, really close to perfect, you can't see his chicken skinny legs in these pictures).
Man, my husband is hot. We have been together almost 8 years and he has really always looked this good.
He hates this one, says he looks skinny. Whatever. He looks buff.
Ohhh this boy can do pullups like nobody's business. And it is HOTT!!! His back picture does not do his sexy back justice.
Well, hello tricep.
Mmmmm mmmmm goood. He is one sexy husband and dad. So lucky to have him. So thankful he has helped push and shape me into the new person I am proud to be now.
Man, my husband is hot. We have been together almost 8 years and he has really always looked this good.
He hates this one, says he looks skinny. Whatever. He looks buff.
Ohhh this boy can do pullups like nobody's business. And it is HOTT!!! His back picture does not do his sexy back justice.
Well, hello tricep.
Mmmmm mmmmm goood. He is one sexy husband and dad. So lucky to have him. So thankful he has helped push and shape me into the new person I am proud to be now.My show Oct 29th we will take more pics to watch his progress!!!
Guess You Don't Have to Wonder How I am....
Dear Jon,
Hopefully after I write this I can breathe again......... So sorry that I was raised Catholic and I feel the need to repent every time I do something naughty.
I was a bad girl last night. I had rice cakes and grahm crackers with peanut butter on them.
I don't know what the hell was wrong with me, why I kept going back to that damn pantry and getting more after I finished the last one.
Really, really sorry because I know you are puting a lot of time and energy into getting me ready for this, that you aren't getting paid for.
I was 100% on track the first 5 weeks or wahtever until I started grabbing a lil extra nut butter here and there last week. I don't know where my determination and self control went but they were temporarily gone.
Anyway, I spent a good amount of time beating myself up but I think I am done now... unless of course you have somethign you want to add. You have my word that I am done on unauthorized cheats and I am aware that authorized cheats are coming to a close. I am ready. I want to do this. I signed up for it, and I want to give it all I have, I will give it all I have.
I'm not sure what would make me feel better, if you got mad or didn't get mad at me. Either way. Cardio is done, egg whites and 1/4 c oats are almost done and I will do inner and outter thigh tonight before I teach bootcamp.
Thanks for all you do and for putting up with me when I am at my worst................. sorry again!!
Yours truly,
one with more self control than she had yesterday. and ps my legs hurt. bad. bad. bad thanks for that :)
Hopefully after I write this I can breathe again......... So sorry that I was raised Catholic and I feel the need to repent every time I do something naughty.
I was a bad girl last night. I had rice cakes and grahm crackers with peanut butter on them.
I don't know what the hell was wrong with me, why I kept going back to that damn pantry and getting more after I finished the last one.
Really, really sorry because I know you are puting a lot of time and energy into getting me ready for this, that you aren't getting paid for.
I was 100% on track the first 5 weeks or wahtever until I started grabbing a lil extra nut butter here and there last week. I don't know where my determination and self control went but they were temporarily gone.
Anyway, I spent a good amount of time beating myself up but I think I am done now... unless of course you have somethign you want to add. You have my word that I am done on unauthorized cheats and I am aware that authorized cheats are coming to a close. I am ready. I want to do this. I signed up for it, and I want to give it all I have, I will give it all I have.
I'm not sure what would make me feel better, if you got mad or didn't get mad at me. Either way. Cardio is done, egg whites and 1/4 c oats are almost done and I will do inner and outter thigh tonight before I teach bootcamp.
Thanks for all you do and for putting up with me when I am at my worst................. sorry again!!
Yours truly,
one with more self control than she had yesterday. and ps my legs hurt. bad. bad. bad thanks for that :)
Monday, September 12, 2011
Back Pose
Remember how I told you posing is going to be more than half the battle for me?Well, today I trained with Big Jon and in between shoulder shrug sets I snuck in a few back poses. Out of the 20 I did, I got 2 right. This is one.
I have the hardest time flexing my lats out while keeping my back flat, not pulling my shoulder blades together. It is ridiculously hard for me to feel the correct position. And more often than not, I can only get it right if someone pushes my blades back together while I flex.
Practice makes perfect so I will keep on keepin on.
I practiced walking in my stripper shoes for a good hour today, making dinner for my family, and another family from our ward. I cleaned the kitchen and vaccuumed all 12oo square feet of my downstairs while dodging my 2 year old playing trucks, (which means he was aiming for my "princess" shoes as my 4 year old calls them... she really, really, really likes these shoes... and she would really, really, really like a pair like them so we can be twins).
So I didn't trip, stumble or fall once so I think I must be getting the hang of 5 inch stripper heels. They sure do make my butt look better and higher when I wear them.
Funny how even though I don't have a monthly cycle anymore because of my IUD, I still feel the hormonal shifts monthly. Where I feel bloated and fat one week out of each month. Well that was last week, (could it have had to do with the peanut butter jar as well?... NAAAAH!!!) and I am suprised at how much leaner I feel I look this week all ready. HALLELUJAH!! It could also have to do with the fact that half my menu got taken away from me too... (1/4 c of my oats (WAAAAH), my rice cake (WAAAAH), broccoli (ah, who cares?!), and my afternoon fruit (meh, not that big a deal)
I texted Big Jon this morning and said, after Nov 19th can I have 3/4 c of oats in the am with my egg whites... cuz I feel like I am just gettin started on my breakfast and it is GONE. Dang the bad luck.
haha, he said yes. WOOOHOOOO!! Love me some plain oats with egg whites. Sound disgusting? Take all sodium out of your diet, eat it for one week and it will taste like pure BLISS!!!
Anyway, training went well today. Cardio is going great, I am lifting heavier. My spark is still lit so I am on fire pushing my body and reminding myself each time I feel tempted to eat something I shouldn't....
"the desire to compete well must be stronger than the desire to eat anything."
and..
"figure athletes do not eat to satisfy, they eat to fuel."
and those two things are getting me through pretty well as of today.
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Progressive Pictures
Dear Jon,
Are you working tomorow? If you are, I need to find a babysitter and train (Again) this week with you.
Why, yes he was working. He has a few wives. The beautiful Shawna, the gym and all us girls who compete.
I needed some time with Big Jon today. I was jumping out of my skin this week again. I was not supposed to be weighing myself, which for some reason translates into "Teri, go ahead and cheat on peanut butter twice a day. No one will know. You can't step on the scale."
Uhhhhh... hello idiot?
You know. And the guilt is overwhelming. It feels like a tight rope inching closer and closer to the middle of my throat and at any given time it could just cut my breathing off altogether and I could potentially die of suffocation all because of some freakin peanut butter.
Really?! Is it that good? Do I love it that much? Is it worth feeling the suffocating? Is it worth the guilt? Is it worth worrying I won't be ready because I can't keep the dang spoon out of the jar?
No, you are right-- it isn't.
Thank goodness Big Jon had time for me today. I went in, practiced posing for 45 long minutes. Posing seems like it would be the easy part of the whole training regimin maybe. But, it is not. The goal is to look natural, buff, and beautiful all at the same time... while in a small swimming suit with tall heels.
Not much about that sentence is "natural" for me. But I can practice and I can get better. I will practice and I will get better.
I was sad to report that my weight is up 2 lbs from last week (Jon didn't care, but I did because I know the 2 lbs is from the dang peanut butter jar). My body fat however (most important number) is down from 15% to 13%.
I needed to hear that number. I needed it like a mom needs to hear a crying baby after child birth. I needed it like a diabetic needs insulin. It has been a flat week, workouts feeling blah, diet not so great (first cheat unapproved since August 1), and since my kids have been sick... I feel my body thinking about it as well. Even though I kindly tell my body everyday it is healthy and strong and it feels AWESOME!
Dude, I need a hair cut. Side note.
Jon is happy with my progress pictures, happy with my body fat percentage, not too angry with my cheats, or atleast he didn't seem too angry. Although he DID change my diet this week, so I don't know maybe he was more angry than he let on.
Back pose is hardest for me. The goal is to have my lats pushed out, while having my shoulder blades flat, not pulled together like in the picture to the left. You wouldn't believe how difficult of a process this is for me. Especially while trying to remember to suck my stomach in, push my butt out, hold my heels together, and hold my hands in the specific spot. It's like, SO many things to remember. I'll get it. I'll keep practicing.
Front pose is probably the easiest and most natural pose for me. I can remember it fairly well and seem to do it right most of the time. It is amazing how much goes into each pose. I have basically only 7 to remember and they are all mirrors of each other (front and back), (left side, right side), (resting left, resting right), and (Curtsy). The curtsy is perhaps the most fun because I get to engage my sassy attititude in it. I also have to remember how to walk sexy, but not too sexy, and not too fast.
Are you working tomorow? If you are, I need to find a babysitter and train (Again) this week with you.
Why, yes he was working. He has a few wives. The beautiful Shawna, the gym and all us girls who compete.
I needed some time with Big Jon today. I was jumping out of my skin this week again. I was not supposed to be weighing myself, which for some reason translates into "Teri, go ahead and cheat on peanut butter twice a day. No one will know. You can't step on the scale."
Uhhhhh... hello idiot?
You know. And the guilt is overwhelming. It feels like a tight rope inching closer and closer to the middle of my throat and at any given time it could just cut my breathing off altogether and I could potentially die of suffocation all because of some freakin peanut butter.
Really?! Is it that good? Do I love it that much? Is it worth feeling the suffocating? Is it worth the guilt? Is it worth worrying I won't be ready because I can't keep the dang spoon out of the jar?
No, you are right-- it isn't.
Thank goodness Big Jon had time for me today. I went in, practiced posing for 45 long minutes. Posing seems like it would be the easy part of the whole training regimin maybe. But, it is not. The goal is to look natural, buff, and beautiful all at the same time... while in a small swimming suit with tall heels.
Not much about that sentence is "natural" for me. But I can practice and I can get better. I will practice and I will get better.
I was sad to report that my weight is up 2 lbs from last week (Jon didn't care, but I did because I know the 2 lbs is from the dang peanut butter jar). My body fat however (most important number) is down from 15% to 13%.
I needed to hear that number. I needed it like a mom needs to hear a crying baby after child birth. I needed it like a diabetic needs insulin. It has been a flat week, workouts feeling blah, diet not so great (first cheat unapproved since August 1), and since my kids have been sick... I feel my body thinking about it as well. Even though I kindly tell my body everyday it is healthy and strong and it feels AWESOME!
Dude, I need a hair cut. Side note.Jon is happy with my progress pictures, happy with my body fat percentage, not too angry with my cheats, or atleast he didn't seem too angry. Although he DID change my diet this week, so I don't know maybe he was more angry than he let on.
Back pose is hardest for me. The goal is to have my lats pushed out, while having my shoulder blades flat, not pulled together like in the picture to the left. You wouldn't believe how difficult of a process this is for me. Especially while trying to remember to suck my stomach in, push my butt out, hold my heels together, and hold my hands in the specific spot. It's like, SO many things to remember. I'll get it. I'll keep practicing.
Front pose is probably the easiest and most natural pose for me. I can remember it fairly well and seem to do it right most of the time. It is amazing how much goes into each pose. I have basically only 7 to remember and they are all mirrors of each other (front and back), (left side, right side), (resting left, resting right), and (Curtsy). The curtsy is perhaps the most fun because I get to engage my sassy attititude in it. I also have to remember how to walk sexy, but not too sexy, and not too fast.I practiced posing for my hubs after my cheat meal at Olive Garden tonight. (Last cheat for two weeks.... wowzers!) He was impressed. It is nice to hear him say how good I look and how happy and proud he is of me. I feel like it has been a long time coming for me to look like I deserve that hot sexy hunk of a man who married me.... so his support means a lot. And the recongnition that I have worked my booty (literally) off.
Did I mention I am eating fish every day for dinner now? That is one of the changes effective or is it affective? I don't know. Anyway, starts tomorow. Wow, I am not a big fish person so this shall be interesting. But I am 7 weeks away, which is 42 days. That is not a lot of time to finish opperation make Teri a figure competitor.
So I really feel the burn this weekend. I feel ready to buckle down, tighten up the belt and rock this like a hurricane. I am ready to eat a little stricter, lift a little heavier, and cardio train a little harder. I am ready for this. I saw a comment once from another competitor that said "Your desire to compete well must be stronger than the desire to eat any ______whatever food."
My desire was there the first six weeks I had no cheating, and after a rocky week, my desire is back-- stronger and more determined than ever. Nothing is going to stand in my way of being my personal best on that stage Oct. 29th or Nov. 19th.
Rest day tomorow, and Monday it is hit is hard baby. Come jump on the train with me or back the heck off the tracks baby!!!
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Advice
Ok, I know you are reading this. I have a counter on the side, see?!
I just need a little help from my bloggy friends. I don't care who you are, I don't care where you live, I don't care if I used to know you, know you now, or never heard of you. Sister needs some up front advice.
Remember that rant I posted like a month ago about people not being supportive and talking negatively behind my back? Well, the same person continues to do this. I see them every day, not because I want to, but because of my schedule. And every day they say in the most annoying chipperest voice you have ever heard.... "hi Teri, how are ya?!?!?!" or "Ahhhh, you look pretty today!"
I have gone out of my way to replace the negative thoughts I have in my head when I think of this person. I mean, I have prayed diligently to have the strength to be loving and kind and to turn my cheek. BUT today, they were talking trash in front of me... ya I have my ear buds in, but I can still hear and see you!!!!
So my question is, am I doing the honorable, Christ like thing by being polite each time this fakey fake person says hi? Or am I being a pushover and I need to just lay it out there like "I know you don't like me, I have heard from three people you are talking negatively behind my back, so please stop pretending to be my friend."
What would you do? I know there are negative people in the world, I know there are going to be people who don't like me, or that I don't like. I am ok with that. But I just don't understand this little nice to my face, horrible behind my back thing. I just don't get it, and if it didn't hurt my feelings, I know I wouldn't care. But it does and as I have gone from being extremely mad, to sad, to mad again... I really want to just call em out and get it over with so I can stop worrying about it.
Ok, now please hit that little button below that says comment, and tell me... what would you do?!
Oh by the way, today is cardio only. 1 hr on the stair climber and I just have to tell you... I pretty much rocked that stair mill's world.
I just need a little help from my bloggy friends. I don't care who you are, I don't care where you live, I don't care if I used to know you, know you now, or never heard of you. Sister needs some up front advice.
Remember that rant I posted like a month ago about people not being supportive and talking negatively behind my back? Well, the same person continues to do this. I see them every day, not because I want to, but because of my schedule. And every day they say in the most annoying chipperest voice you have ever heard.... "hi Teri, how are ya?!?!?!" or "Ahhhh, you look pretty today!"
I have gone out of my way to replace the negative thoughts I have in my head when I think of this person. I mean, I have prayed diligently to have the strength to be loving and kind and to turn my cheek. BUT today, they were talking trash in front of me... ya I have my ear buds in, but I can still hear and see you!!!!
So my question is, am I doing the honorable, Christ like thing by being polite each time this fakey fake person says hi? Or am I being a pushover and I need to just lay it out there like "I know you don't like me, I have heard from three people you are talking negatively behind my back, so please stop pretending to be my friend."
What would you do? I know there are negative people in the world, I know there are going to be people who don't like me, or that I don't like. I am ok with that. But I just don't understand this little nice to my face, horrible behind my back thing. I just don't get it, and if it didn't hurt my feelings, I know I wouldn't care. But it does and as I have gone from being extremely mad, to sad, to mad again... I really want to just call em out and get it over with so I can stop worrying about it.
Ok, now please hit that little button below that says comment, and tell me... what would you do?!
Oh by the way, today is cardio only. 1 hr on the stair climber and I just have to tell you... I pretty much rocked that stair mill's world.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Your Always Good
I was running late to teach my bootcamp last night, (which means I was there 10 minutes early not my usual 20 minutes) and I stopped to use the ladies room. Seeing one of my usual bootcampers I asked her how she was and she asked me. I told her I was good.
She said "You're always good."
I thought to myself, I guess she is right. I usually am always good. I don't have much to complain about in life. I am on an exciting adventure of becomming a figure competitor, I have a great husband and kids, beautiful-comfortable home, good extended family, food and water. My basic and most important needs are met. I AM good.
I also thought, she must not read my blog because all I do on that is whine. Well, I need to let you in on the excitement of training too! It isn't all crappy and hard. Well, most of it isn't crappy or hard.
Training is intense. 2 workouts a day, and then teaching on top twice a week makes for a busy workout/gym week. But during those training sessions are the few times a week I get to devote to ME and me only. I am a wife and a mom first every where else besides at the gym doing MY thing. I have gotten up at 645 am this week to do my morning fasted cardio. My kids wake up in the middle and I chit chat with them a bit, but mostly they watch cartoons and I sweat buckets climbing hills faster or slower. It is my time to focus on myself. On the things I am interested in, the things that bother me, the muscle tone that is coming in so nicely. It is like other peoples meditation time I guess. My workout time is all about ME.
I can not begin to tell you the enjoyment I get from the sweat pouring down my head, chest, legs. I love it. I am exhilerated and am able to push further with the first accumulation of sweat. I love wiping my shoulder blades of the sweat bubbles. I love to sweat. I love to push my body to go faster, higher, harder, heavier. I love that no one can take credit for my workout but me. I love that I am the one to take the credit if I did a set of 20# dumb bell flies, or when I finish 500 ab moves. That's all me baby. Me and my body workin it, pushing to my edge.
The diet. It's hard to stay on track I am not going to lie. Diet has always been the hardest part of the equation for this gurl. You know what rocks though? Looking in the mirror and seeing my ab muscles start to poke through, looking down during leg extensions seeing my quads wanting to rip out the top of my leg. You know why my muscle looks like that? Because I am eating to FUEL, not for the pleasure I have always done before. The food does taste good, it gets a little old-- but it is what it takes to push my body to the next level. And I am so thankful I get to experience what it FEELS like to have a healthy body inside and out.
Some may say this is extreme, and I am likely to agree with you. But I am also likely to tell you this is the biggest growing experience I have had in a while, I am pushed so far out of my comfort zone I could kick the next hot chick I see in the butt. I am no longer seeing EVERY girl thinking, "I wish I looked like her," I am seeing myself and saying "I can't believe I look like this."
It is a process of determination, hard work, and diligence. Nothing comes over night. I have heard people say we are what we repeatedly do, therefore excellence is a habit... or something like that. I have been putting in every ounce of energy and sometimes more than I feel like I have to get through this journey. I have dedicated the next two months to being really more about me than anyone else. It feels good. I can't believe what my body can do, and I can not stress enough how mental this game is. You have to choose, and then force your actions to adhere to what you have chosen.
If it were easy, to be fit and healthy... everyone would be. It is not. It is sacrificing, it is a constant decision, and even a constant battle against the unhealthy world to make this your life. But it is worth it to look in the mirror and like what you see, to know that you are as least likely as humanly possible to get a disease or a cancer caused by an unhealthy lifestyle, to know that if you see something you want to try--physically--you more than likely can do it.
Like everything in life, you can choose to make it a dreaded part of your day. The gym, the diet. Or you can make it the best, most celebrated part. I know which will get your further. We don't HAVE to exercise and choose healthy food, we GET to. Now go start living THAT life, and do it the very best YOU can.
She said "You're always good."
I thought to myself, I guess she is right. I usually am always good. I don't have much to complain about in life. I am on an exciting adventure of becomming a figure competitor, I have a great husband and kids, beautiful-comfortable home, good extended family, food and water. My basic and most important needs are met. I AM good.
I also thought, she must not read my blog because all I do on that is whine. Well, I need to let you in on the excitement of training too! It isn't all crappy and hard. Well, most of it isn't crappy or hard.
Training is intense. 2 workouts a day, and then teaching on top twice a week makes for a busy workout/gym week. But during those training sessions are the few times a week I get to devote to ME and me only. I am a wife and a mom first every where else besides at the gym doing MY thing. I have gotten up at 645 am this week to do my morning fasted cardio. My kids wake up in the middle and I chit chat with them a bit, but mostly they watch cartoons and I sweat buckets climbing hills faster or slower. It is my time to focus on myself. On the things I am interested in, the things that bother me, the muscle tone that is coming in so nicely. It is like other peoples meditation time I guess. My workout time is all about ME.
I can not begin to tell you the enjoyment I get from the sweat pouring down my head, chest, legs. I love it. I am exhilerated and am able to push further with the first accumulation of sweat. I love wiping my shoulder blades of the sweat bubbles. I love to sweat. I love to push my body to go faster, higher, harder, heavier. I love that no one can take credit for my workout but me. I love that I am the one to take the credit if I did a set of 20# dumb bell flies, or when I finish 500 ab moves. That's all me baby. Me and my body workin it, pushing to my edge.
The diet. It's hard to stay on track I am not going to lie. Diet has always been the hardest part of the equation for this gurl. You know what rocks though? Looking in the mirror and seeing my ab muscles start to poke through, looking down during leg extensions seeing my quads wanting to rip out the top of my leg. You know why my muscle looks like that? Because I am eating to FUEL, not for the pleasure I have always done before. The food does taste good, it gets a little old-- but it is what it takes to push my body to the next level. And I am so thankful I get to experience what it FEELS like to have a healthy body inside and out.
Some may say this is extreme, and I am likely to agree with you. But I am also likely to tell you this is the biggest growing experience I have had in a while, I am pushed so far out of my comfort zone I could kick the next hot chick I see in the butt. I am no longer seeing EVERY girl thinking, "I wish I looked like her," I am seeing myself and saying "I can't believe I look like this."
It is a process of determination, hard work, and diligence. Nothing comes over night. I have heard people say we are what we repeatedly do, therefore excellence is a habit... or something like that. I have been putting in every ounce of energy and sometimes more than I feel like I have to get through this journey. I have dedicated the next two months to being really more about me than anyone else. It feels good. I can't believe what my body can do, and I can not stress enough how mental this game is. You have to choose, and then force your actions to adhere to what you have chosen.
If it were easy, to be fit and healthy... everyone would be. It is not. It is sacrificing, it is a constant decision, and even a constant battle against the unhealthy world to make this your life. But it is worth it to look in the mirror and like what you see, to know that you are as least likely as humanly possible to get a disease or a cancer caused by an unhealthy lifestyle, to know that if you see something you want to try--physically--you more than likely can do it.
Like everything in life, you can choose to make it a dreaded part of your day. The gym, the diet. Or you can make it the best, most celebrated part. I know which will get your further. We don't HAVE to exercise and choose healthy food, we GET to. Now go start living THAT life, and do it the very best YOU can.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Quote
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." - Mark Twain
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Sunday
Today is Sunday, the day I pack up my kids and husband (usually) and go to church for three hours. I do not workout on Sundays. I may occasionally go for a easy walk by myself or with the kids... but nothing streneous. Sunday is for resting at my house.
Well my almost 4 year old got new shoes yesterday and she wanted to try em out today (of course she runs faster in these ones), so since my hubs is on shift, I took the two kiddos for a little walk. Careful to remember my keys so that we wouldn't be locked out of the house if the garage opener didn't work again.
Ya, about that. Apparently I don't have a house key on my key ring.
So we chilled outside for a while and then caught a ride to my husbands truck to pick up the garage door opener and got back home safe and sound. Got ready for church and made it. No tramatic crying sessions.
I have been back on track with my eating plan, I might have had a couple extra licks of almond butter, unless Big Jon is reading this... and then I did no such thing.
I was ready to hop back on my wagon of healthy eating today. Yesterday was a good rest, I ate a lot of good stuff... but I did really feel sick from it. I didn't even really eat THAT much, I know my body has just gotten out of the habit of having junk, and it doesn't like junk anymore. Which is great. If I could take my mind compeletly out of the equation I have no doubt I could eat competitor style the rest of my life, I know my body would like it more.
Training early tomorow with Big Jon. Then I am sure I will have some unheavenly amount of stairs to climb, and my treadmill will be here for fasted cardio Tuesday morning (unless my husband never wants any lovin again from me..... and then it might be later haha)
Anyway, just a random date from lil ol me... figure competitor in training. It's a work in progress and every day I get a little closer and a little better hopefully.
Hope your Sunday has nourished you spiritually like mine has.
Make it a great week!
Well my almost 4 year old got new shoes yesterday and she wanted to try em out today (of course she runs faster in these ones), so since my hubs is on shift, I took the two kiddos for a little walk. Careful to remember my keys so that we wouldn't be locked out of the house if the garage opener didn't work again.
Ya, about that. Apparently I don't have a house key on my key ring.
So we chilled outside for a while and then caught a ride to my husbands truck to pick up the garage door opener and got back home safe and sound. Got ready for church and made it. No tramatic crying sessions.
I have been back on track with my eating plan, I might have had a couple extra licks of almond butter, unless Big Jon is reading this... and then I did no such thing.
I was ready to hop back on my wagon of healthy eating today. Yesterday was a good rest, I ate a lot of good stuff... but I did really feel sick from it. I didn't even really eat THAT much, I know my body has just gotten out of the habit of having junk, and it doesn't like junk anymore. Which is great. If I could take my mind compeletly out of the equation I have no doubt I could eat competitor style the rest of my life, I know my body would like it more.
Training early tomorow with Big Jon. Then I am sure I will have some unheavenly amount of stairs to climb, and my treadmill will be here for fasted cardio Tuesday morning (unless my husband never wants any lovin again from me..... and then it might be later haha)
Anyway, just a random date from lil ol me... figure competitor in training. It's a work in progress and every day I get a little closer and a little better hopefully.
Hope your Sunday has nourished you spiritually like mine has.
Make it a great week!
Saturday, September 3, 2011
BooYah Stair Climber
(Please keep reading to appreciate why I have this side view of my glutes included in this post hahah)
Ya that's right.
It's me, the ol cussing crazy momma of two who kicked the crap out of my stair mill this morning.
After I threw in some heavy lifting shiz.
I mean I freaking busted a damn move. All because I recognized my feelings, I let them be ok, I found some solutions, and I changed my attitude. (holla, Amy!!!)
I don't have to do this. I get to. And I love it.
I love lifting heavy crap. I think I might start strong woman competing after this (is that a sport) because I just feel so damn cool lifting heavy crap at the gym. (Just kidding, I am not going to start that or invent it, but I do really love lifting heavy stuff)
My personal favorite was my last lift today assigned as 3 sets of 10 bicep curls. Then 2x40 drop sets bicep curls.
Dude I rocked that like nobodys biznass. I freaking lifted 40 lbs for 3 sets of 1o. Then I got a 50# bar, 40#, 30#, 20# and on my last set I had to drop to 2, 8# dumbells to finish the set. I mean it was heavier than I have ever lifted.
Then I made peace with the stairclimber, who is prolly gonna miss all the use I give it. I hope my glutes don't miss it TOO much, cuz I took a picture in my new stripper heels yesterday with my regular suit pulled up high like my figure one will be... and I am not gonna lie. This girls glutes kick the crap out of (most of) those girls glutes at the show I was just at.
I mean, the side view is pretty vulumptious for the reals. Ahh what the hell, I think I'll add the picture so you can appreciate it too haha.
Cheat meal today, got turned into cheat afternoon by my beloved trainer and my pizza lunch was heaven. Soo good. Tried not to hurt my stomach too bad overfilling it, and I have to say, I think I did pretty well........
I love working it!!! Lift heavy crap if you aren't already. You will fall in love. Sisters in Iron as one a my girls says. I love it. Sisters in Iron baby!!!
Friday, September 2, 2011
Support Systems
I have said it before and I will say it again, having a support system of people you love, and who love you makes a big difference in accomplishing, or not accomplishing your goals.
I was up and had my kiddos both in tow by 8 am, to get to the club for an hour of fasted cardio on the dreaded stair mill. I secretly hope every.single.time I get to the gym someone, anyone will be on the stairs and I will have to walk on an incline until they get off. Ever since I have started wishing this, of course... no one else wants to use my damn climber. What's their problem? I feel like walking around and asking people if they'd like to use it for a quick session. But.I.do.not.do.that.fyi.
I finished a less than stellar performance on the climber, went down to pick up kids from daycare, to be greeted by "Your precious baby girl said she hates us today" from my beloved daycare ladies. Really, we don't even allow the word hate to be used at our house. Thank you, preschool? Maybe, who knows. So I pull out my mom card and make her understand that isn't ok, and she must say sorry. After about 10 minutes and as much encouragement about how brave and good she is for doing the right thing and apologizing for hurting their hearts, she apologizes and we head to the car.
Really? Why? My girl is so sweet, never a problem. Really, she is one of the best behaved children I know. My baby boy 2 year old, on the other hand. Terror.
Anyway, so we come home and I am eating, showering, and waiting for my friends kids to come over so I can watch them while she trains-- then she is watching my kids while I lift with Big Jon. Cancellation. Wont work, life happens and I had to revamp. I had already revamped from the original sitter situation. Then I was scrambeling. Thank goodness my cousin was willing and able to take my kiddos so I could accomplish today's training.
I started crying outside and inside. I am exhausted. I am drained. I am not having fun, I am not "enjoying this process." I have stress up to my friggin eyeballs and I want to quit. I am sick of tosseling my kids from one place to the next, sick of thinking 24-7 about how I am going to accomplish the next session of training.
I call the 3 people I know will tell me like it is and converse with them on whether I am just wigging out or if I really need to quit.
All of them say. You have to make the choice, pray about it. You will know.
Damnit. I know I will know. I don't want to know I want someone to tell me what to do.
I will be so embarrassed if I can't finish this competition. I have told, like, everyone what I am doing. I have worked my butt off for 32 days. I am 1/3rd of the way there. Will I regret doing this later, or will I regret not doing this later?
My poor trainer. I show up, pisssed. Don't want to workout. I would rather whine and cry. So he makes me lift friggin I dunno what they are called, tripple sets? What the crap? I whine the whole time anyway. Not about the lifting. I love the lifting. I love lifting heavy crap. I definitly could push heavier weights because I was just so mad and frusterated.
He had a lot of words of wisdom. He is a wise man, I have a testimony of Big Jon. In addition to his big muscles he also has brains and a background in psycholgy which helps him deal with crazy people like... ME.
First he says I am normal. Everyone is sorta wigging out at this point. Then he says I look really good for 8 weeks out. I am leaner, he doesn't care about my weight... staying steady at 130.7 ish. He understands I can't do fasted cardio everyday. I will regret it if I quit. He knows I am capable of doing this and I need to just chill or my gains are going to be harder to come by. Stress is no good for the body. Oh ya, he asks me to start tanning a little. Don't judge. I love tanning and I love him for asking me to do it.
I broke the news that I have drank a diet soda every day but one this week. He said, that's ok. I broke the news that I eat a banana with peanut butter every cheat meal in addition to tacos and chips and salsa or whatever my meal is. He said, that's ok.
He told me what he eats for his cheat meals and I feel like that jacker has been holdin out on me!!! Guess what this girl gets tomorrow?! Idaho Pizza yo. And I am gonna looooooove on it like nobody's bizness. And then, I will also drink a diet dr pepper, and then I will also eat atleast 1 banana, maybe even 2 with peanut butter and chopped walnuts.
That's what is getting me through. That piece of heaven of dinner I get tomorow. Y to the um I can not freaking waite til tomorow.
As I am on my way home I think, what if I could borrow my moms treddy mill and do fasted cardio every single day first thing in the morning and stop having to go to the gym 2x or 3x a day sometimes? What the heck, can't hurt to ask.
"in your situation, that's a great idea."
And the heavens poured down blessings on me because I can breathe again!!! This lightens my stress load by like a million millimeters, my mom is willing to share. And I can stop this freaking out every, single day about when and how I am going to get in all my training. Thank you Lord!!
I have to break the news to my man tonight that I need him to get some help to get that treddy over here, and pronto. But I think he will be totally fine with it when he realizes just how much easier this is going to make my life.
All I could think since my trainging session is how mad at myself I'd be in 10 years if I quit now. I will always wonder if I could have done it, if I could have won, if I could have looked like some ghetto faboulousness on stage. I will always wonder what the end result would have been. And I have to say, I am just not ok with living that way..... so I will focus in on the next two months. It is only two months and I know that I can do this. I know I can be a good mom, wife, daughter, and friend. I know I can put myself first for the next 2 months in order to fullfill this once in a lifetime journey.
I am strong, I am capable, and I am going to rock the rest of this journey with my head held high. I can, and so can you. Accomplish hard things. We can conquer. What are you conquering today?
I was up and had my kiddos both in tow by 8 am, to get to the club for an hour of fasted cardio on the dreaded stair mill. I secretly hope every.single.time I get to the gym someone, anyone will be on the stairs and I will have to walk on an incline until they get off. Ever since I have started wishing this, of course... no one else wants to use my damn climber. What's their problem? I feel like walking around and asking people if they'd like to use it for a quick session. But.I.do.not.do.that.fyi.
I finished a less than stellar performance on the climber, went down to pick up kids from daycare, to be greeted by "Your precious baby girl said she hates us today" from my beloved daycare ladies. Really, we don't even allow the word hate to be used at our house. Thank you, preschool? Maybe, who knows. So I pull out my mom card and make her understand that isn't ok, and she must say sorry. After about 10 minutes and as much encouragement about how brave and good she is for doing the right thing and apologizing for hurting their hearts, she apologizes and we head to the car.
Really? Why? My girl is so sweet, never a problem. Really, she is one of the best behaved children I know. My baby boy 2 year old, on the other hand. Terror.
Anyway, so we come home and I am eating, showering, and waiting for my friends kids to come over so I can watch them while she trains-- then she is watching my kids while I lift with Big Jon. Cancellation. Wont work, life happens and I had to revamp. I had already revamped from the original sitter situation. Then I was scrambeling. Thank goodness my cousin was willing and able to take my kiddos so I could accomplish today's training.
I started crying outside and inside. I am exhausted. I am drained. I am not having fun, I am not "enjoying this process." I have stress up to my friggin eyeballs and I want to quit. I am sick of tosseling my kids from one place to the next, sick of thinking 24-7 about how I am going to accomplish the next session of training.
I call the 3 people I know will tell me like it is and converse with them on whether I am just wigging out or if I really need to quit.
All of them say. You have to make the choice, pray about it. You will know.
Damnit. I know I will know. I don't want to know I want someone to tell me what to do.
I will be so embarrassed if I can't finish this competition. I have told, like, everyone what I am doing. I have worked my butt off for 32 days. I am 1/3rd of the way there. Will I regret doing this later, or will I regret not doing this later?
My poor trainer. I show up, pisssed. Don't want to workout. I would rather whine and cry. So he makes me lift friggin I dunno what they are called, tripple sets? What the crap? I whine the whole time anyway. Not about the lifting. I love the lifting. I love lifting heavy crap. I definitly could push heavier weights because I was just so mad and frusterated.
He had a lot of words of wisdom. He is a wise man, I have a testimony of Big Jon. In addition to his big muscles he also has brains and a background in psycholgy which helps him deal with crazy people like... ME.
First he says I am normal. Everyone is sorta wigging out at this point. Then he says I look really good for 8 weeks out. I am leaner, he doesn't care about my weight... staying steady at 130.7 ish. He understands I can't do fasted cardio everyday. I will regret it if I quit. He knows I am capable of doing this and I need to just chill or my gains are going to be harder to come by. Stress is no good for the body. Oh ya, he asks me to start tanning a little. Don't judge. I love tanning and I love him for asking me to do it.
I broke the news that I have drank a diet soda every day but one this week. He said, that's ok. I broke the news that I eat a banana with peanut butter every cheat meal in addition to tacos and chips and salsa or whatever my meal is. He said, that's ok.
He told me what he eats for his cheat meals and I feel like that jacker has been holdin out on me!!! Guess what this girl gets tomorrow?! Idaho Pizza yo. And I am gonna looooooove on it like nobody's bizness. And then, I will also drink a diet dr pepper, and then I will also eat atleast 1 banana, maybe even 2 with peanut butter and chopped walnuts.
That's what is getting me through. That piece of heaven of dinner I get tomorow. Y to the um I can not freaking waite til tomorow.
As I am on my way home I think, what if I could borrow my moms treddy mill and do fasted cardio every single day first thing in the morning and stop having to go to the gym 2x or 3x a day sometimes? What the heck, can't hurt to ask.
"in your situation, that's a great idea."
And the heavens poured down blessings on me because I can breathe again!!! This lightens my stress load by like a million millimeters, my mom is willing to share. And I can stop this freaking out every, single day about when and how I am going to get in all my training. Thank you Lord!!
I have to break the news to my man tonight that I need him to get some help to get that treddy over here, and pronto. But I think he will be totally fine with it when he realizes just how much easier this is going to make my life.
All I could think since my trainging session is how mad at myself I'd be in 10 years if I quit now. I will always wonder if I could have done it, if I could have won, if I could have looked like some ghetto faboulousness on stage. I will always wonder what the end result would have been. And I have to say, I am just not ok with living that way..... so I will focus in on the next two months. It is only two months and I know that I can do this. I know I can be a good mom, wife, daughter, and friend. I know I can put myself first for the next 2 months in order to fullfill this once in a lifetime journey.
I am strong, I am capable, and I am going to rock the rest of this journey with my head held high. I can, and so can you. Accomplish hard things. We can conquer. What are you conquering today?
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Really Great Post from my Trainer- Big Jon
Have you ever seen a really impressive "before" and "after" photo on a weight loss product?
Well, there's something that the diet industry doesn't want you to know. There is more involved than just the diet product, and it's the same across the board. Look into the eyes of any person in their "before" picture and you'll see that they are deeply disturbed. The body they have is no longer in sync with the body they are able to accept. They changed the body that they accept, and became disturbed. Now look into their eyes in the "after" picture – see the sweet satisfaction? They now live in the body that they decided they could accept. What an amazing feeling that is. Why are you still living life in your "before" body? Sure, you have obstacles that get in your way – your schedule, your job, your kids, the weather, your knee injury from college…but ultimately you have the body that you accept. I'm going to repeat that so it will really sink in. You have the body that you accept. Transform from "Before" to "After"You may not realize it, but you already posses everything you need to transform your body, and it all starts with taking responsibility for the body that you have today. You are in your current shape because, until this moment, you've been OK with it. Oh I know you aren't thrilled with it, and you even talk about losing weight and getting fit - but you haven't changed what you'll accept. Here's how to transform your body in 3 steps: Step One: Feel DisturbedIt has been said that emotion creates motion. This is essential when it comes to personal transformation. Just like those folks in the "before" pictures, to transform your body you must first decide that you can't live another day in the body you currently have. Get your emotions stirred up. Make a list of all the reasons that you're ready to lose weight and get fit. Get disturbed. Step Two: Decide What You WantWithout clarity you'll never get where you want to go. Now that you're disturbed with the body you have, decide what the body you can accept looks like. Think in concrete and specific terms. Just like the captions under ‘before" and "after" pictures - "Shannon lost 50 lbs," "Matt lost 8 inches from his waist," "Catherine went from a size 20 to a size 4." Get a clear picture in your mind of what you'll look like in your "after" picture and decide what the caption will read. Step Three: Take ActionThe time spent between your inspiration (now) and taking action determines whether you will succeed or fail. Don't allow yourself to get stuck between inspiration and action - there is always something that you can do immediately. Take action by emailing or calling me now to set up a fitness consultation. I am here to take you from your "before" picture to your "after" picture. What will your "after" caption read?
Well, there's something that the diet industry doesn't want you to know. There is more involved than just the diet product, and it's the same across the board. Look into the eyes of any person in their "before" picture and you'll see that they are deeply disturbed. The body they have is no longer in sync with the body they are able to accept. They changed the body that they accept, and became disturbed. Now look into their eyes in the "after" picture – see the sweet satisfaction? They now live in the body that they decided they could accept. What an amazing feeling that is. Why are you still living life in your "before" body? Sure, you have obstacles that get in your way – your schedule, your job, your kids, the weather, your knee injury from college…but ultimately you have the body that you accept. I'm going to repeat that so it will really sink in. You have the body that you accept. Transform from "Before" to "After"You may not realize it, but you already posses everything you need to transform your body, and it all starts with taking responsibility for the body that you have today. You are in your current shape because, until this moment, you've been OK with it. Oh I know you aren't thrilled with it, and you even talk about losing weight and getting fit - but you haven't changed what you'll accept. Here's how to transform your body in 3 steps: Step One: Feel DisturbedIt has been said that emotion creates motion. This is essential when it comes to personal transformation. Just like those folks in the "before" pictures, to transform your body you must first decide that you can't live another day in the body you currently have. Get your emotions stirred up. Make a list of all the reasons that you're ready to lose weight and get fit. Get disturbed. Step Two: Decide What You WantWithout clarity you'll never get where you want to go. Now that you're disturbed with the body you have, decide what the body you can accept looks like. Think in concrete and specific terms. Just like the captions under ‘before" and "after" pictures - "Shannon lost 50 lbs," "Matt lost 8 inches from his waist," "Catherine went from a size 20 to a size 4." Get a clear picture in your mind of what you'll look like in your "after" picture and decide what the caption will read. Step Three: Take ActionThe time spent between your inspiration (now) and taking action determines whether you will succeed or fail. Don't allow yourself to get stuck between inspiration and action - there is always something that you can do immediately. Take action by emailing or calling me now to set up a fitness consultation. I am here to take you from your "before" picture to your "after" picture. What will your "after" caption read?
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