Sleep

I am in training, it is 10:30 pm and I should be sleeping. I have been up since 4 am, with a stubborn 2 year old boy......

I went to a show today. I was feeling so ok after it. I did my training, an extra 5 minutes on my stair climber that I used to hate but love now because it better make my butt look better than theirs did today.

And then I started wigging out. I have been freaking out, like almost having a panick attack since 9. I don't know if my hubby is going to make it to my show due to his new job... I may be doing a show 2 weeks early as well as Nov. 19th to just check it out and hopefully get prejitters out. He might not be able to come to that either.

I am spending a butt load of money that I don't really have to do this. I have all 4 of our birthdays between now and my real show in Washington Nov. 19th.

I feel like crap from my treat/cheat meal at lunch today. My stomach is bloated. I feel like a fat cow and I am FUUUUREAKING out that my body isn't going to be ready and I have my ducks in a row and I am going to be disappointed and I can't sleep, can barely breathe I just cant chill the heck out.