Cravings

Do not go away, apparently. I have been told.

So today, while I was at Maverick, emotional obviously. Because I am an emotional eater. I seriously considered stealing doughnuts, cookies, these pizza bread things, but suprisingly, to tell you the truth... the candy didn't entice me too much. It was all those yummy processed carbs.

It has been a rough day. It seems like I am having more and more rough days which concerns me because I have 81 days of prep left. And while I know that it is going to be here in a blink of an eye, and I wont believe how fast it will have gone by... in these moments of despair, of anger, of sadness, of feeling misunderstood... the time is going by slow.

I have made a plan for post show. It is like this. Nov 20th eat whatever I want all day long. Probably feel really sick. Nov 21st come home and make lots of different types of cookies, that I might share with neighbors or Jared's co workers. And then Nov 22nd, I will eat strictly on my plan again, through thanksgiving (indulging there obviously) and after 1 week I will re evaluate with Big Jon how my eating should look.

For now, I am dreaming about cookies. Oatmeal chocolate chip, chocolate chip, pumpkin chocolate chip, and sugar with cream cheese frosting.

I have been thinking about them all day and I hope to stop very soon. Because they are making my moods more sharp and are making my stomach hurt thinking about them.