Who am I?

I have had a rough morning to say the least. I wish I could blame external factors for the overwhelming stress and guilt I have felt all morning... but I can not. I have brought it all on myself by using words that were not thought through before they were spoken.

I have prayed and prayed and beat myself up for almost 18 hours now. Luckily I haven't felt this way for a long time, and after this situation I can honestly say I don't think this issue will come up again.

A long time ago during a family home evening my cousins husband said something nice about each of us in the room. I remember him getting to me and what he said surprised me. That I was genuine and that I never talk bad about anyone. That I always lift other people up.

That struck my heart and made me proud of who I am.

Today, I haven't felt so proud and I definitely haven't lived up to that description that I so want to be accurate of myself.

Lessons learned. As I have used this blog as an outlet for encouragement and a place to share the struggles of going from an unfit, sad about the way I look mom, to a super fit, happy, and inspired mom. I have always wanted this blog and my journey into the health and fitness industry to be one that is backed by love. Love from myself, and love from the Lord... sharing that He wants us to be happy, He wants us to set goals, and He wants us to give our very best at whatever we choose to do.

I have chosen this road and I love it every single day. There are hard times, times when I feel like a cookie monster who could eat every whole box of cookies in the Wal Mart isle. Times when I have gotten hurt, times when I have gotten tired and wanted to quit... but each time I have been able to remind myself of what I really really want in the long run-- and remembered what it takes to get there.

One foot in front of the other, one meal at a time, one sweat session at a time.

I am not perfect and I have never claimed that, but I have said that I am trying my best and am aiming for perfection-- with the realization that the Lord is going to make up where I lack.

So today, I encourage you. Take a look at the person you are inside, and worry less about the person on the outside. Are you happy with that one? Are you doing the things that please your conscience? Are you doing the things and saying the things to and about people that would bring happiness to their hearts (as I say to my 4 year old)? If you aren't, I say-- re evaluate who you are and what you stand for. It is never too late to make the right choice, never too late to be a good person who is genuine and kind-- that builds others up around them.

Right now-- I am doing my best to accurately represent that description that was said about me years before. If I have caused hurt or sadness or anger, I am truly sorry-- and I will do better.